I've seen some really great marriages and I seen some totally implode. My intention this morning is to encourage, not throw rocks. You see, I live in a glass house. If I start throwing stones, it could turn out not so good for the home team. So what is a "victim"?
Definition: a person who suffers from a destructive or injurious action.
We can all relate to this definition. I mean the top stories on the news generally involve a victim. These stories draw you into the victims world knowing your emotions will connect with the victim and their situation in the story. It works! The part we never see is hard work some victims put in to go from victim to "game-changer".
I could write a book about all the victim stories that I've witnessed in my life but that would only drag or hold society back. God loves His people well, but He does not desire for them to stay stuck in a rut or wallow in their own self-pity always playing their victim card. I love coming alongside a victim, allowing them time to grieve and watch them crawl out of the pit. There are victims in every marriage. There are victims in every failed marriage. Part of healing is forgiving...not holding a grudge, not staying a victim.
True friendship is wanting what is best for your mate. In a family that may be a child or your spouse. One-sided decisions in a marriage show inconsideration for the feelings of your spouse. For example: Your spouse will really appreciate it if you clean up your own mess as soon as you made it. True love also overlooks your spouse's faults. A marriage becomes a friendship when both partners genuinely enjoy each other's company. Learn from each other by becoming both a student and a teacher in your marriage.
Chad O
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